Ugly Girl - December 26, 2012

Wow she gets ugly... she can feel and say some shit that is unbelievably cruel. Only by having others treat her with cruelty has she learned how to act this way herself. However, youth and an unfortunate past are not license to continue in this pattern. Earth energy is heavy...God... "heavy" has been such a predominant theme in my life... I want to fly....I want to be "the wind" the air gently rustling through the leaves or blowing fiercely from time to time,with a purpose in mind...a destination,a goal... The last time I set a "major" goal in stone and saw it through in "the right way" I believe I was 16 years old...Come to think of it, that is the last time I "really admired myself"...WTF really??? Thats some hard core shit considering that I am 54 years old...huh...lets see (pauses to use calculator...) 38 freakin years ago... WOW...what a waste of fucking time and energy and life...not another minute...not even one, will I intentionally waste. Commit...be what you commit to be...only then will you have integrity for yourself...practice all that shit you preach bitch...stuff a sock in your mouth and press the "just do it" button...Do it, and do it well with love and hope and service and joy...